When does love fade?

Does love fade when it’s forgotten?

Or does it fade when it’s nowhere same when it started in?

Does it fade in the absence of chocolates and bouquets?

Or perhaps when there is no more chase?

Does it fade when someone new comes along?

Can someone just wipe it off like its never wrong?

Does it fade with time?

Or does it fade when it is no longer understood?

When would you know?

Or will you ever know?

Or does it even fade?

Or if really did fade, was it love?


A Letter From GOD


Dear Caryl,

You will have a wonderful life. You will have many families, although the best is right in your home.

You will have plenty of friends by age 15, even though only few will still treat you the same in your early 20’s—this few will be the best and you won’t need more.

You will suffer many heartbreaks even before you reach your 20’s—heartbreak in all forms. Some people will mock at your suffering, pretend to care when they don’t, some will try to pull you down, or even pull you away from Me, but you will not allow that.

You will be stronger each day for you are with Me.

Some will try to get what you have, some will steal things away from you—but you can let it go, because I can see Your sacrifices and sufferings, and I will give you much more than what you’ve lost. Just have faith in Me.

Your curiosity will lead you to many questions, but there will be people who will help you wander through life to answer those. Some of them will only stay until you solve some of your questions, while some will stay for good, for you to help them answer their own questions.

By age 21 you might start to understand that each heartbreak you overcome are all for a greater purpose—to make you the best.

You will have near death experience, or even times when you have to hang on a thin thread but you will not die. You will not die because you won’t allow it. You will not die because I am with you.

Love always and forever,


If this isn’t love- it just can’t be.

(Because I’m pretty certain you’d come across this somehow. To my love, my moo, please know this is for you. ayiii. Kiligon naa siya 😛 )

Unsent Letter

1.  You won’t believe me if I say, I am not confident talking with other people I just met, but the first time we did– instantly I became comfortable, like everywhere you go is my home.

2. I am not good at socializing. The thought that I want to get closer to you and I want to know more about you gives me the courage to talk to your family and have fun with them… and incredibly I feel comfortable, like we are a family to begin with.

3. I am not good at multitasking like you probably thought I am. I used to study with my doors locked, no facebook, no music, only me, but with you by me I feel like I can do anything even while chatting with you, texting, or even talking to you.

4. I am not into selfies, but I can never say no anytime you ask for one. 😉

5. I am never good at planning. That’s my weakest, but whenever I talk to you I can’t help but plan about our life together.

6. We have a different set of playlist, I was into Linkin Park, All Time Low, A7x…and you were into A Rocket to the Moon, Boys Like Girls, and acoustic music–yet I love sharing headset with you.

7. I’m a realistic-cynic-individual, but somehow you are making me loss my reasons.

8.You make me feel like I’ve never been in love before, then you make me wonder if it was love I had before.

9. You make me feel like I was never broken ever.

10. I’ve never been certain, but with you I am–and indeed this is love.






My Alpha-Class Love

Jean Caryl Barquilla

(In case he’d come across my blog at least he’d know this is me)

I’ve never posted a poem in awhile. It’s not like I don’t want to, its just that I’ve been not-so-inspired to do so.

Since I’ve been on cloud 9 lately with my boyfriend. My second boyfriend, and hopefully my last. Here’s my new poem dedicated for him. Inspired by our X-Men movie marathon from night till dawn. 🙂

To my one and only,

If I may hold Professor X’s telepathic powers,

I’d dwell on your thoughts every second of the day,

Talk with you wherever you may be.

I’d project my own thoughts for you—

then you’d know how you’ve taken control over my mind.

If you’d be Magneto then let me be your Mystique,

and I’d be your #1 follower and fan,

For you were one of the people who accepted me for who I am,

And if you’d go for further mutation and turned Beast,

Rest assured I’ll still be your Mystique.

If by chance I can teleport like Nightcrawler,

I’d go to you in an instant and we’ll teleport to places we’d love.

If I’d be Rogue then you’d be my Wolverine—

For in you, I feel safe.

My love is greater than Iceman’s ice and Pyro’s fire,

And remains greater compared to the whole mutants combined power,

And if time comes that my hair turns as white as Storm’s,

I’d continue to love you still.

PS. I love you Ivan. I really do. Sending you hugs and kisses.

Disneyland it is!

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So I traveled back to my childhood last Christmas. Disneyland Hong Kong.

This would  be a late post but at least I get to show people who are interested to visit Hong Kong a peak of what is it like to be there, or at least what it was like for me. It was an awesome place, it’s like ultimately going back to your childhood fairy tales, and magical life. You can live there knowing that you speak the same language ‘Disney’-language, regardless not knowing anything about Cantonese. If you go there, you should try all their rides. Literally ‘all’. Whenever I see people there lining up, I line up along with them as well, that is without knowing what I am actually lining up for. Nothing disappointed me, it was a packed of surprises. There is that thrill lining up for something you don’t really know. DSC_0023 2 If you go there, you should line up for Mickey & Minnie’s picture. It’s surely fulfilling, Mickey is the Disney’s symbol after all. 😉 And right after you go home, I bet you’d feel the same as me as well…you’d be eager to watch again your childhood Disney movies 😉


I was in Manila for more than two months. I stayed there in preparation for the first Psychometrician board examination in the Philippines. The thought that all my school years specially my college years, plus months of review would be tested in just a matter of two days is causing me too much anxiety, not to mention those people that were expecting me to pass.

To give you a gist of my more than two months life in a place I am not so familiar with…it’s a 976.609 miles away from my home, and 976.609 miles away from my family.

But it was my faith that keep me burning. For I believe that the best is yet to come.

There will be more post this coming days…for in my preparation and to save money, I deprive myself from wordpress, animes, and so much more. So… there are plenty to post right now which I have been keeping for months. 😉

Cappucino frappe has been my favorite companion during my two-month review. So if you happen walk near University of Manila, or University of the East…try to drop by Frappe Tea and order Capuccino frappe. 😉
Footlong. Not really my type, but when there was storm and it flooded, the only store opened was the one selling footlong. So I guess it saved me. 😉

Hot Choco

Sunday hot choco on the backdrop of the city away from home, Christmas songs on the background, having breakfast on my own. This is loneliness in exchange for a greater pursuit.

~~feeling blessed like I always do. Thank You Lord.

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I’ve been away for months in preparation for my board exams. The board exam happened last October 28-29. A two-day heart pounding event.

All the years I spent with school, all the reviews I did for months was tested in a two-day exam. I am still waiting for the result that will either make me or break me, but either way I’ve been preparing for whatever it is. At first I was totally feeling down after the exams, and I wasn’t that confident. It is depressing because there are people that are expecting me to pass and I don’t want to fail them, but on the other side of the coin, their expectations helped me with my preparations. It serves as a great motivation for me for all those sleepless nights that I had.

My friend once told me,

“It’s okay to be hopeful because you did your best.”

So that is what I am doing now. I am hoping and praying for the best.

Why worry when you can pray. 😉